Day 9 – To Hexham

Once upon a time there was a roman bloke who happened to be a road builder.  Unfortunately for me, Maggy, Leo, Greg, Nigel & Clyde this road builder hadn’t been drowned at birth or suffered some fatal disease during puberty or been killed whilst en route to the UK and then once on these shores and he discovered his passion for road building, hadn’t thought of GOING AROUND HILLS but he preferred to go over them.!  Now I am sure that if one was marching to see an emperor,  galloping on horseback  (or flying a plane) a straight line is obviously the most direct route and I am sure that if ones head remaining on ones shoulders was dependent upon getting to said emperor as soon as possible then the Time/Distance/ Fuel efficiency/Speed/ Head on shoulders equation all works out, BUT, continuous rolling hills in a straight line in 2010 on a push-bike, like the A68 from Edinburgh, is not my idea of fun or efficiency.  Roller Coaster hills on a roller coaster are fun, roller coaster hills on a push-bike are not.  Nuff said.

So, … day nine.  We (royal we) decided to to get us all out of bed at crack of sparrows to be on the road for 0600.  Breakfast at 05.30.!(Darkness).  This was a cunning plan to avoid the rush hour traffic to/from Edinburgh and to get us to the Slaney Hall hotel by early afternoon so we could enjoy an afternoon by the pool /in the bar/health spa.  Between Edinburgh and the Swanky Hall hotel lay about 130km of Roman road and a few Scottish hills and a small amount of Northumbrian back roads (and hills).  We rode in silence for a while as we all tried to work out if we could sleep on the bikes and remain upright whilst moving forwards, the answer wasn’t discovered (luckily) but the very thought gives you an idea of how we have been feeling today.  No functions to attend just 190km(approx) of road, oh and a few hills.  For those of you who have never been to the land of Haggis, Burns, Ben Nevis, Bag-pipes and the Kilt you really don’t know what you are missing.  It is some of the most stunning scenery I have seen in the UK.  However, as Mansell Jr said on Scottish TV yesterday, ’the tarmac in the north looks very similar to the tarmac in the south’ and strangely, on this point alone (today), he is not wrong.  There have been a few dummys flung from a few prams today as we make our way south.  We passed through a beautiful village this morning after about 40 miles and it was strange to see no people about, it was only as i passed the clock tower and realised it was before 8am that it clicked in my slightly fuddled thinking that it was still early morning.  Our coffee stop was a welcome wake up call and parked in a lay-by in southern Scotland with a hot cup of Magnus Maximus and a Big Maggys flap jack life for today began to look a bit more rosy.  Another 50 or so miles and a few very testing climbs saw us at our lunch point on the border.  The agony bags were being squeezed by a man in a kilt and squealing noise was taken by the wind back into Scotland.  We sat on the English side and looked back at what we had just climbed up and over and could not see any towns or cities.  Ahead was a fantastic descent and a big headwind and about 60 miles to the hotel.  No worries, it was only two club rides.

Yeah, right, Two club rides, my sore @r*e.!  The next break for coffee at about 35 miles was after another few good hills and Clyde had the cheek to suggest he was beginning to feel his legs and his neck was a bit sore.  Day 9 Adam, Day 9.!!!  He had completed a half day yesterday as we didn’t count Glasgow to Edinburgh as a full day and todays ride.  We were all feeling a bit tired at this point and we (royal we) had a little nap in the chair as we all drank our coffee and LR8.   Moments later we were all off again to complete the remainder of the journey.  More straight roads, more hills, more stops for drink, clothes, bars, food, a little nap and we were on the last stretch to Slaney.  The last 6 miles were agony and all of us have really felt today. All of us were asking for food in the last mile or so despite having stuffed our faces all day.  The slight rise of the driveway to the hotel reception stung the legs a bit but we climbed over 2000 meters today and we know this is day 9.  

The plan has changed for the morning and we are having a bit of a lie in.  We are now missing Harrogate altogether and going from here to Darlington then on to Leeds to stay the night there instead. 

Really tired now and with a lack of internet connection i am not sure when this will be posted. Hopefully it will be before we finish.

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• August 4, 2010
• BY Ian Williams
• IN